Have you ever attempted something and 'failed'?
Maybe an exam at school, maybe a business, maybe a parenting style. Whilst the word 'fail' makes many of us uneasy to use, many people use it daily.
When you allow this type of vocabulary to move from a 'sometimes word', to a daily one...you are actually setting yourself up to fail.
"Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up"
"Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up"
Thomas Edison
Let's look at some examples of stories people play in their minds in a little more detail -
- My child is just not listening to me and is rebelling. I've failed as a parent.
- My business is just not growing to the heights I imagined. I've failed.
- I didn't get the score I needed in my exam. I failed.
How do those phrases above make you feel simply by reading them?
Let's look at some examples of stories people play in their minds in a little more detail -
- My child is just not listening to me and is rebelling. I've failed as a parent.
- My business is just not growing to the heights I imagined. I've failed.
- I didn't get the score I needed in my exam. I failed.
How do those phrases above make you feel simply by reading them?
Pretty miserable and negative I'm sure. Then imagine what those words are doing as a story in your own mind playing over and over and over. Maybe they are already playing in your mind........
Now, let's take this a step further - What do you do if someone says that to you?
If you are a parent, and your child says 'I didn't get the score I needed in my exam, I failed. What do you say back?
Now, let's take this a step further - What do you do if someone says that to you?
If you are a parent, and your child says 'I didn't get the score I needed in my exam, I failed. What do you say back?
- 'Yep you certainly did, wow what are you going to do for the rest of your life now you've failed'......would you say that? No!
If a friend approached you and said 'My child is just not listening to me and is rebelling, I've failed as a parent'. What do you say back?
- "Oh yes you are the biggest parenting failure I know. Your child is out of control. Yes you've failed". Would you say that? No!
If a colleague approaches you and says 'My business is just not growing to the heights I imagined, I've failed'. What do you say back?
- 'Oh yes you certainly have! That's a big F for failure from what I can see'. Would you say that? NO!
Yes these are definitely exaggerations to get the point across, however.....read them again and think... have you ever said those words to yourself.....or even close.....some will answer Yes!...... Now if you wouldn't stand there and say that to a friend or colleague - then why would you let stories and vocabulary like that enter your own mind when it comes to yourself....let alone stay there playing on repeat?
Flick that mindset switch!
One of the tools I always use and have used for years is to flick a mindset switch - 'flick the switch' as I like to call it, and it's something that you can certainly do in this instance.
Let's start with a very simple exercise:
If a friend approached you and said 'My child is just not listening to me and is rebelling, I've failed as a parent'. What do you say back?
- "Oh yes you are the biggest parenting failure I know. Your child is out of control. Yes you've failed". Would you say that? No!
If a colleague approaches you and says 'My business is just not growing to the heights I imagined, I've failed'. What do you say back?
- 'Oh yes you certainly have! That's a big F for failure from what I can see'. Would you say that? NO!
Yes these are definitely exaggerations to get the point across, however.....read them again and think... have you ever said those words to yourself.....or even close.....some will answer Yes!...... Now if you wouldn't stand there and say that to a friend or colleague - then why would you let stories and vocabulary like that enter your own mind when it comes to yourself....let alone stay there playing on repeat?
Flick that mindset switch!
One of the tools I always use and have used for years is to flick a mindset switch - 'flick the switch' as I like to call it, and it's something that you can certainly do in this instance.
Let's start with a very simple exercise:
Most people will see themselves, and then only 2 directions to go.Either head towards success or go the opposite towards failure.
Like the picture to the left.
With a simple mindset switch, put yourself at the beginning, and then view any 'failures' as simply 
life lessons and a little pit stop, or stepping stone on your way to success.
...now doesn't that feel a whole lot lighter in your mind already?!
life lessons and a little pit stop, or stepping stone on your way to success....now doesn't that feel a whole lot lighter in your mind already?!
So when you feel that there is really only one way to go, and sometimes little 'challenges' pop up, 'flick that mindset switch', then just brainstorm a way to learn from it, get over it, and move closer and closer to your success!
Be Inspired by others who have felt the same way!
The difference between those who succeed despite perceived failure is that they acknowledged it, learned from it, and used it as a stepping stone to success.
Thomas Edison
....went through thousands of 'failed' attempts to create the light bulb and famously said "I have not failed. I just found 10,000 ways that won't work".
Fred Astaire
....after an early audition was described as 'Can't sing, can't act, balding, can dance a little'. He ended up becoming one of the most loved and famous actors, dancers, and singers of his time. He famously said "Do it big, do it right, and do it with style"
JK Rowling
....has said“I was jobless, a lone parent and as poor as it is possible to be in modern Britain, without being homeless,”' - and credits a lot of her success to her perceived 'failure'.
Be Inspired by others who have felt the same way!
The difference between those who succeed despite perceived failure is that they acknowledged it, learned from it, and used it as a stepping stone to success.
Thomas Edison
....went through thousands of 'failed' attempts to create the light bulb and famously said "I have not failed. I just found 10,000 ways that won't work".
Fred Astaire
....after an early audition was described as 'Can't sing, can't act, balding, can dance a little'. He ended up becoming one of the most loved and famous actors, dancers, and singers of his time. He famously said "Do it big, do it right, and do it with style"
JK Rowling
....has said“I was jobless, a lone parent and as poor as it is possible to be in modern Britain, without being homeless,”' - and credits a lot of her success to her perceived 'failure'.
At her famous Harvard commencement speech, she said "Failure meant a stripping away of the inessential. I stopped pretending to myself that I was anything other than what I was, and began to direct all my energy to finishing the only work that mattered to me. Had I really succeeded at anything else, I might never have found the determination to succeed in the one area where I truly belonged. I was set free, because my greatest fear had been realized, and I was still alive, and I still had a daughter whom I adored, and I had an old typewriter, and a big idea. And so rock bottom became a solid foundation on which I rebuilt my life.”".
....take inspiration from this blog, and from the thoughts and quotes of these amazing people.
Flick that mindset switch, take that failure word out of your story, and turn it into a stepping stone! The world is waiting for YOU!
....take inspiration from this blog, and from the thoughts and quotes of these amazing people.
Flick that mindset switch, take that failure word out of your story, and turn it into a stepping stone! The world is waiting for YOU!
PS: As always, I absolutely love having essential oils diffusing around me, so at the end of every blog, I like to leave you with a recipe relating to the subject. Enjoy this special blend!
EASY, BREEZY, BREATHE
Ingredients
- 3 drops Lavender essential oil
- 3 drops Peppermint essential oil
- 3 drops Lemon essential oil
Instructions
Add drops into your diffuser as per diffuser instructions.
PS: Please note I only use and recommend Young Living Essential Oils. If you are just starting out and don't understand the difference yet, don't worry, I was there too until 11 years when ago I started researching. I always thought all essential oils were the same, and it was such a wormhole of information! Because I like to make life easier for everyone, I created a Facebook group with all the basic information I found. This group will make your research so much easier. Click here if you would like access :)
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